Pressure

We all have some kind of relationship with pressure there is no denying it.  It’s always present whether it's self imposed or thrown on us by someone else. Pressure is a part of our daily life and the decisions we make.  The four most common types of pressure are:

• Social and peer pressure

• Professional and academic pressure

• Internal and psychological pressure

• Economic and financial pressure.  

Each of these four types of pressure can be broken down into more specific subtopics. Our life experiences make us more susceptible to some of these types of pressure than others.  To be honest I know I can experience all of them in the course of my day.  Pressure isn’t just something we put on ourselves.  We also experience pressure from the people we have relationships with in our jobs, families and friend groups.

One phrase I used to quote all of the time was “pressure is a privilege.” I thought that phrase was telling me that I was important and what I was doing meant something.  It reminded me of the gravity that my decisions and choices could have on myself and others.  Today I have a much different view of that phrase.  Why do I have to feel pressure to understand how important my decisions are or that what I do can make a difference? That question led me to another, Does pressure help me perform better? Both of these questions really opened up my eyes and forced me to reflect on a deeper level. 

Social And Peer Pressure

Social and peer pressure have always been a significant factor in how people act and react to what is going on in their lives.  The advancement and popularity of social media has only made this type of pressure more influential and harder to navigate in our daily lives.  We internalize this type of pressure but the reality is it often starts from the judgement, beliefs and experiences of others.  It’s rarely built on what is best for us and it can invade our subconscious and control us without us even recognizing it.  We get overwhelmed with comparison rather than being fascinated with who we are and what we want to be.  

Professional And Academic Pressure

When I think of this type of pressure I think of performance and how deeply rooted it is in success, achievement, advancement and meeting deadlines.  This can be self imposed and also directed by our colleagues, bosses, family and friends.  I find that this type of pressure can be combatted by learning to focus more on the journey and on personal growth. When we invest our time more on progress and less on the end result the pressure isn’t nearly as great.  This takes a lot of work and self confidence and must be practiced. Positive affirmations have made all the difference for me in this area. I tend to see how far I’ve come and that provides me with a sense of satisfaction and the encouragement to keep going.  

Internal And Psychological Pressure

This type of pressure is associated with things like imposter syndrome, guilt and obligation.  Guilt and obligation are the things that we probably deal with a lot and can recognize more easily.  Being a self professed people pleaser I never used to want to say no to people.  Letting others down even if it wasn’t something important could literally stick with me for years.  Textbook guilt and a loyal obligation to people could send me into a pretty dark place if I didn’t come through for people.  This wasn’ t something they would make me feel either; this was entirely on me.  I have tried to analyze this for years but I’m just not sure where this has come from.  

Imposter syndrome has been something else that I have struggled with during my career.  When I would get a promotion or take on a new leadership role I was always excited initially, but that would change in a heartbeat.  I would immediately experience a high level of anxiety, think I was unworthy and think to myself “what am I doing? I don’t deserve this, I don’t know enough to meet expectations.” The level of anxiety I’ve had to work through would surprise even my closest friends because I would work so hard to try to hide it from people.  This in itself created a pressure I didn’t need.

Economic And Financial Pressure

I feel that of all the different types of pressure this is probably the most obvious.  It comes down to making ends meet and providing for myself and my family.  This is probably the most understandable type of pressure.  Now I will say there is also that pressure that comes from comparing ourselves to the Jimmys and the Joes when we see the material things that they have accumulated.  I think that speaks more to jealousy but I can easily see how people would view this as pressure and want to keep up with their peers.  This can cause a fear of being left behind.  

What Does It All Mean?

All of this pressure regardless of what kind it is can be connected to a few common themes.

• Comparison

• The opinions of others

• Our own perceptions of success

This might be an oversimplification of pressure, however the more simple we can make it the easier it is to combat it. I’m sure some of you may disagree with my take on pressure and that’s fine.  I’m not saying that all pressure is bad, but I am saying it can become a negative factor in our life if we don’t maintain our perspective.  Why not change the perception of pressure? Instead of pressure being associated with the outcome we transfer the energy we feel from pressure to focus on learning and growth.  

We allow people to apply pressure on us based on their experiences and perceptions.  Those things aren’t the same as standards.  Our best performances come from our ability to apply what we have learned from our own experiences to meet the standards set for us.  We should never internalize the pressure of others because that’s an unfair comparison.  We’re all different people with a different set of experiences that have shaped our perspectives.  

This week take the time to reflect on the pressure you feel from yourself and others.  Identify what type of pressure it is, how it makes you feel and if it is improving your performance?  Write down your answers and at the end of the week review what you have written. Is your life, not just your performance better because of the pressure you have felt? Once you have answered this question, take the time to look for any patterns or trends that show you when pressure benefits you and when it doesn't.  Have a  great week and remember to light the WICK of leadership by working hard, acting with integrity, being committed and practicing kindness.  When your commitment is greater than your feelings you get results.